I find it quite funny
How you can be so dependent on your sister
With every step or stone dropped
With every “whoops” or mistake
Her nagging voice could
cause a serious headache
Trying to find our destination
While making our way through these dark woods
As we pass through each negative sound
Family is one of the most important things to us
The same thought that goes around
I still find it quite funny
How we’re complete polar opposites
Being the Sun or the Moon
Choosing to go left or to go right
We are a balancing force
Who won't let anything wicked,
Be the change in our course.
We are siblings
Always will be
Always there
Though her company may get salty and annoying
Our brother-sister bond is pretty rare
We have learned our lessons,
nothing too good can be true
And to never to eat from a candy house
Keeping our practical minds straight
“we shall soon find the way,”
through this cruel, wicked world
How you can be so dependent on your sister
With every step or stone dropped
With every “whoops” or mistake
Her nagging voice could
cause a serious headache
Trying to find our destination
While making our way through these dark woods
As we pass through each negative sound
Family is one of the most important things to us
The same thought that goes around
I still find it quite funny
How we’re complete polar opposites
Being the Sun or the Moon
Choosing to go left or to go right
We are a balancing force
Who won't let anything wicked,
Be the change in our course.
We are siblings
Always will be
Always there
Though her company may get salty and annoying
Our brother-sister bond is pretty rare
We have learned our lessons,
nothing too good can be true
And to never to eat from a candy house
Keeping our practical minds straight
“we shall soon find the way,”
through this cruel, wicked world
The poem was crystal clear into alluding Hansel and Gretel. Although, in the second stanza, there were only five lines, so just add another line.
ReplyDeleteYou wrote your poem in a creative way and it was clear who your allusion was about, one thing you should do is add a little more into your poem, i feel like its short and id like to read more.
ReplyDeleteLike Kaye Anne said, your poem is good and the reader is able to see that you're alluting to Hansel and Gretel. Its good as it is now but to make it even better, I feel like you could go deeper into why you chose to allute to this story. It would make things more dramatic and personal (:
ReplyDelete